First things first: you are not broken and you don’t need fixing. If things are not going to plan in an aspect of your life, you may need additional support, advice or direction or a complete change altogether.
YOU ARE NOT WRONG, just different.
I believe everyone has their own unique contribution to make in the world. If you’re reading this blog post, you’re likely to be a creative person with a side hustle, a woman working in a male dominated environment, or maybe you just want to try something new and bring more satisfaction, joy and happiness in your life – but you have no idea how.
DON’T WAIT FOR PERMISSION
Take small steps towards your new life. What do you truly enjoy doing? What makes your heart sing? How can you make some time to do more of that? Start by making small steps towards your goal. If you dream of going to Japan, start researching places you’d like to go. Cut out pictures of places you’d like to visit. Grab some freebie brochures from your local travel agent and enjoy looking through them. Set your intent. Watch some Japanese films. Get on forums to chat to people who’ve been there. All these small steps, help get you closer to your dream.
GO WHERE YOU’RE CELEBRATED, NOT TOLERATED
If you’re struggling with your role at work or you’re not enjoying where you are living, there are always options. One way to get out of the loop of being overwhelmed by your situation is to think of all the aspects you specifically dislike and write a wish list of what you do want instead. What would be the opposite of each bad thing? For example, we were putting up with a broken bed for some time. Neither of us could sleep properly and we wondered why we would sleep like a baby in hotels, or staying with friends. I bought new sheets and duvet covers. Changed the curtains. But then eventually, after months of looking at all kinds of mattresses online, we just went and got a whole new bed. Top tip: if you’re going to buy an expensive thing like a mattress, try it out in person. Finally, on a whim, we walked into a bed shop, tried out three beds and bought not just a mattress, but a whole new bed and headboard.
It took me some time to make the leap to feel I deserved a good night’s sleep, I deserved a good quality bed and for someone to deliver it and put it together for me. Believing you can have a major upgrade your life can take time, so taking little steps towards the goal will really help. That thinking period isn’t necessarily wasting time, it can be important preparation to envision the change and ease into the mindset. And you can do the same for pretty much anything.
WORK OUT WHAT SUCCESS LOOKS LIKE
If you feel as if another month, or year has slipped by and you’re still in the same situation, start working out where you want to be by the end of the year. Or this time next year. Or in five years. How will you know if you’ve got there?
- Reflect on your past successes
- Celebrate what you’ve already achieved this past year.
- Keep a record of all you’ve done
- Review your to-do lists, and mark all you’ve ticked off.
- Give yourself targets and challenges – such as “get one public speaking gig”
- Get a mentor – hello!
- Find your tribe, a group of like-minded people to support you
Remember beyond everything else: yes, you are a vital part of the universe with a unique contribution to make.
Every job, every skill, every experience (good or bad) is contributing to who you are, what you can offer in the future and who you are becoming. You don’t always know where you’re headed but you can at least enjoy the ride. Ditch looking for the ‘right thing’ and follow your joy.